|
a |
|
Preeti on the Web |
|
Providing Food for Thought |
|
Pushing the Boundaries of Birth |
|
For more and more women today, having a baby in one’s late 30s and 40s is the way to go. |
|
More women becoming mothers in their late 30s and 40s |
|
October 3, 2005 |
|
To Contact Preeti: preetiontheweb at yahoo dot com |
|
Please note that all text on this webpage is copyrighted ©. Please do not quote or paraphrase without using proper citations. |
|
On January 16, 2005, a history professor made history. Adriana Iliescu gave birth to a baby girl in Bucharest. Ms. Iliescu was 66. This retired professor is the oldest woman to have given birth. And while Iliescue is an extreme example of delayed motherhood, more women are having children in their late 30s and 40s—still considered old by fertility specialists. From 1978 to 2000, birthrates among American women 35 to 44 more than doubled, according to the National Center for Health Statistics. Today, women in their 20s often find that while they are biologically ready for a child, they are neither personally nor financially ready. By the time many women get educated, find a partner and achieve financial stability, they are well past their 20s. Over the years, many of the traditional objections to older motherhood have been dispelled. For example, increased life expectancies have reduced the concern that an older mother may orphan her child. And, while some argue that women in their 20s are more likely to have the energy to chase a toddler, women in their 40s are suitably prepared in other ways. Women in their 20s are often just starting their careers and working themselves up from the bottom of the totem pole. Older women are more likely to have established themselves in their careers and earned the seniority needed to take more time off and have more flexibility in their work schedules. Yet unfortunately, many older mothers feel that society negatively views them as selfishly putting careers ahead of children, and wanting “too much.” In a recent article in the British Medical Journal, fertility specialists wrote “Women want to ‘have it all’ but biology is unchanged; deferring defies nature and risks heartbreak.” When it comes to the “wanting-it-all” argument, though, many women argue that it isn’t the case at all. On Internet discussion boards, women adamantly deny that they are guilty of wanting too much. One woman writes, “I am sick and tired of being continually bombarded with this view that women who don’t have children until their late 30s are ‘wanting it all’ or have ‘made a conscious decision’ to delay pregnancy. Like many women these days, I met and married my husband later in life and so did not have the opportunity to have children before turning 35.” A 26-year-old British woman despairs, “…it is impossible for me to even contemplate motherhood. I have not yet repaid the £10,000 debt I acquired at university and I can’t even afford to buy a small terraced house in which to raise a family. My partner and I need to work for several more years until we can support a child financially….” Many fertility specialists says that articles like the one in the British Medical Journal are simply informing women that fertility problems increase after 35, a fact many women don’t fully realize until it’s too late. When faced with difficulties in conceiving, however, many older women use donor eggs from women who are typically in their 20s. Donor eggs also reduce the higher risk of birth defects that older women who use their own eggs face. Clearly, we shouldn’t fault women who have children later in life. They’ve waited until they were financially and emotionally ready. They’ve waited until they found a committed partner. And even if they wanted a career as much as a child, there’s nothing wrong with that—men have been doing it for a long time. Ultimately, what’s missing from this debate is the question of why our cultural and economic climates fail to promote pregnancy at a biologically optimal age. Despite gains in equality, women still perform a disproportionate share of household work. More than ever, families need two earners and college degrees to stay financially afloat. According to the Children’s Defense Fund, a year of daycare costs more than public college tuition in all but one state. (In Durham, NC, it costs a median $6,968 to keep a baby in daycare for a year.) The ultimate measure of a society’s adaptation to its environment is its ability to sustain itself. With more women finding themselves in an environment hostile to motherhood, not only are they having to delay children, but birthrates worldwide are plunging below the replacement fertility rate—2.1 children per woman—needed to prevent population decline. Modern-day society may be heading from womb to tomb. |
